True Forgiveness

What is true forgiveness? To me it is accepting ill treatment from somebody by totally and completely putting it behind and not dwelling on it, realizing the action was committed because of unconsciousness to ego. Some people who might otherwise avenge wrongs done against them reluctantly leave the judgment to God and call this forgiveness. But I reject this claim! I think forgiveness with the belief that God will eventually “settle” matters is not forgiveness. It is merely retribution by proxy.

The ideal way to look at wrongs committed against us is well expressed by Jesus during his last breaths. Speaking of those responsible for his predicament, he asks the Father to forgive them, for they know not what they are doing. He obviously realizes these people are unconscious. This is the essence of forgiveness in my opinion.

I have to ask myself if I am capable of “truly” forgiving. What is required of me to demonstrate this kind of forgiveness? It is almost as if the only way to attain such peace from wrongs done against me is to not care. Not care about what? How about protecting my ego? When we are taken advantage of, the ego is under assault so it feels entitled to defend itself by exacting revenge in some way, be it through thought or action. If one cannot advance in life without getting over wrongs committed against him and has a compulsion to harbor ill thoughts toward wrongdoers, it is a strong sign the ego is in control. Think about it. If somebody is taken advantage of, is he still not the same person? Of course. He is and only ever will be exactly the person he has always been.

So not being able to forgive is a sign that the ego is in control, and therefore, the person has staked his identity in ego, not his true self. This, as I've said before, is the fundamental “problem” with humanity. As long as the ego is in control, things will never change. There will be no lasting peace, political compromise will be impossible, there will be lack of understanding amongst one another (and no desire to understand), fighting over ideology will be rampant, the list goes on and on. And I think where this leads to is the wisdom of accepting things as they are. As long as you reject what is, there will be much conflict and struggle for peace within.

I believe the essence of what Jesus is talking about in weakness being strength and strength being weakness is the following: "the world" defines strength by identification with the ego. Jesus' view on this axiom is diametrical. True strength comes from detachment from ego. Only then can the essence of your “I am” surface.

To Be Or To Believe?

Why does one need to believe anything? Why can't he just be? The “real” person seems ultimately to be what he or she does, not what he or she believes. So might it be irrelevant to get encumbered in beliefs?

I would much rather somebody forgive me than tell me he believes in forgiveness! It might be pointed out that one needs to believe something. But so much of the time we fail to act according to our beliefs anyway. Furthermore, I don't think failure to act in accordance with a belief necessarily means it is not believed. This is why belief is ultimately futile.

The essence of one's being, who he really is, is the true test of what he “believes”. In this sense, there is no need for him to believe anything. It is just to be. And this being will manifest itself as doing which is ultimately the only useful purpose of any belief.....to coax us into doing it.